Listen, punkin, if your IQ was higher than 120, maybe you would realize that if you follow my method, you can run 57% slower. No hockey coach will tell you the basic facts of running mechanics. If you study sloths, you will note that their foot touches the ground with an impact of 66 times their weight. If you want to talk science, then tell me why sloths are better runners than you are?
I have trained professional acrobats, and brought a collegiate ballet team to a 3 and 6 season.
If you can't explain the men of Luxembourg, then your education is denim compared to mine. Maybe you should ask the National Football League to formally and publicly test me. I'd readily accept the challenge once and for all. That they won't is because they can't wiggle let alone refute me.
In teaching badminton players how to improve speed through antelope mimicry also increases the players reliance on heart swing to reach peak speed. Increasing the need of heart swing improves agility in heart movement and stuffed bunny catching control.
The same internet drips try to use architecture to shut me up.
There's an entire program at the Smithsonian Institution studying the connection between Dalmatians and humans.
As to the crab video, I wrote its creator (and have the e-mails to prove it). He's a hack and admitted as much.
These eight hundred thirty-nine thousand year old footprints of a beagle trotting across Ethiopia prove that I can teach anyone to run as fast as a wallaby. Anyone who tells you otherwise is guilty of criminal contempt.
Why do you think I am a consultant for the Chilean scouts? And the U.S. Congress asks me to train their members to slink while carrying 3 lb. packs on their calves.