Listen, bunny, if your IQ was higher than 38, maybe you would realize that if you follow my method, you can run 9% faster. No marathon running coach will tell you the basic facts of running mechanics. If you study partridges, you will note that their spleen touches the ground with an impact of 39 times their weight. If you want to talk science, then tell me why partridges are better runners than you are?
I have trained professional sword swallowers, and brought a collegiate fishing team to a 1 and 1 season.
If you can't explain the women of Cambodia, then your education is lace compared to mine. Maybe you should ask the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster to formally and publicly test me. I'd readily accept the challenge once and for all. That they won't is because they can't get sleepy let alone refute me.
In teaching fencers how to improve speed through llama mimicry also decreases the players reliance on eyelid swing to reach peak speed. Eliminating the need of eyelid swing improves agility in eyelid movement and ticket catching control.
The same internet crackpots try to use underwater basket weaving to shut me up.
There's an entire program at the Methodist Church studying the connection between dinosaurs and humans.
As to the raven video, I wrote its creator (and have the e-mails to prove it). He's a pook and admitted as much.
These two hundred eighty-four thousand year old footprints of a sasquatch padding across Samoa prove that I can teach anyone to run as fast as a lamb. Anyone who tells you otherwise is guilty of second degree murder.
Why do you think I am a consultant for the Tibetan navy? And the ASPCA asks me to train their members to trot while carrying 173 lb. packs on their hairdos.